Planning to have a “Sugar Baby”? You Might Want to Read This!
Are we headed in a direction where every relationship is becoming more and more transactional? A relationship where we happily exchange ‘Love’ for everything materialistic? Maybe Yes!
Table of Content
A surprisingly genuine use case for “TikTok”
How TikTok helped me identify a “Sugar Couple”
What is Sugar Dating?
4 Observations w.r.t. Sugar relationships
— I. The rules are pretty simple
— II. The shocking reason people choose to be sugar babies — College Debt!
— III. The increasing transactional nature of all our relationships!
— IV. A Symbiotic relationship
Old Wine, New Bottle
Final Reflections
If you think this article is in anyway related to parenting or having a baby, please do walk away from this article. You might be surprised what the world is up to these days. I can afford one less “read” in my Medium stats, but polluting your mind is never my intention.
A surprisingly genuine use case for “TikTok”
Please do not judge me when I say I watch TikTok videos, at least not before you finish reading this article. I have identified a very genuine use case for TikTok — something the TikTok CEO should have used in his testimony to Congress.
Whenever you are travelling to a new country for the very first time and wish to know about all the rubbish crap happening around you, just open the TikTok app and let it know your location.
You would be surprised to see innumerable ways people are innovating just to behave in a more stupid manner. But despite wasting your valuable time on cheap videos and reels, this controversial app will also provide you great insight into the culture and lifestyle of the area. You will see the trendy tunes people are dancing to, the latest road fight, the famous local eatery shop, latest fashion in the area, and who are the local superstars!
How TikTok helped me identify a “Sugar Couple”
During one of my business visits to Singapore, I happened to come across a TikTok video of a pretty odd couple. The male was probably above 50, with very identifiable Caucasian features and the lady was young 20s, south east Asian with very attractive body features. The couple was dancing to one of the viral tunes and all there videos had been getting millions of views.
Love definitely comes in all shapes, sizes and ages but such a couple would definitely raise some curiosity among the viewers. I looked at their profile and they had posted hundreds of videos in which they were making merry by all means. Despite the odd nature of their relationship, they both looked happier than I had seen many of my committed friends in a long long time.
I went through the comments on the videos, and then came to realize that the couple were “Sugaring”, also termed as “Sugar Dating”. Watching their videos, one could easily tell that the couple had way too much ‘sugar’ in their relationship.
What is Sugar Dating?
For all the innocent readers, I am sorry to corrupt you with all the adultery in the world, but “Sugar Dating” is essentially a relationship (romantic or sexual) between an old wealthy person and a beautiful young person. The old person is seeking companionship, and the young person is seeking financial support. Hence, each of the partners desires what the other has in abundance. Usually, the wealthy old person is a male, called as “Sugar Daddy” and the beautiful young lady is a female called as “Sugar Baby”.
Coming to the curious case of Singapore’s Sugar Couple, Singapore is a very rich country surrounded by a number of developing countries. Immigrants from surrounding countries often travel to Singapore for a better salary. The harsh reality is that majority of domestic maids and laborers in Singapore are from nearby developing countries including Philippines, Indonesia, Vietnam, Bangladesh, India. The divide between the locals and immigrants is clearly visible in terms of social status and lifestyle.
A place where the rich expats meet the needy — there is the first prerequisite for a sugar relationship. More I watched their TikTok videos, more intrigued I was to understand the nature and existence of such relationships. I read quite a few articles online and realized that such relationships are more common than we think.
Sharing below 4 critical observation with respect to “Sugar Dating” which you should know!
I. The rules are pretty simple — one partner is successful and old, the other partner is young and attractive.
Sharing below a snapshot from a leading Sugar dating website seeking.com which indicates an attractive young woman and a successful man as ideal candidates for Sugar dating.
If the fact that there is a website for this arrangement is not enough to shock you, take a look at the stats indicating more than 40 million members worldwide “seeking” for such relationship.
And there is no reason why the gender roles cannot be reversed!
II. The shocking reason people choose to be sugar babies — College Debt!
Although it is against my moral compass, but I can understand why wealthy old men would want such an arrangement. But why would an attractive, young, educated and well mannered lady prefer to do this? Wikipedia has an answer for this.
With the rising costs in tuition, cuts to scholarships and bursaries, as well as the increasing pressures of student debt, sugar dating has become prevalent among students.
Research suggests that there is a growing phenomenon of female university students working in the sex industry to pay for their post-secondary education.
Source: Wikipedia
III. The increasing transactional nature of all our relationships!
I might be tempted to curse “Sugaring” and paint a very heinous picture through my article — but is it the only thing wrong with relationships these days?
Is it not true that all our relationships are becoming more and more transactional these days?
Let me quote an example of an age old Indian tradition.
During a marriage, the bride’s parents are expected to give gifts to the groom’s family — termed as “dowry”. Originally conceptualized as a gift and and without any interference from the groom’s family, in present day dowry has become an instrument to satisfy the greed of groom’s family. Eventually, the bride’s family end up paying a hefty amount in cash and kind to the groom’s family. Although widely criticized and even illegal, this is still practiced in certain parts of the country. Similar practices exist in many other countries including China.
Now think in this fashion — isn’t the bride’s family ‘sugaring’ the groom’s family? And if this is truly the case, what is the harm in a “Sugar relationship”? Maybe it is merely an evolution of an age old practice.
IV. A Symbiotic relationship
I remember being taught in my Biology class about “Symbiosis” — which is a phenomenon where two organisms form a relationship which is mutually beneficial to both the organisms.
Sugaring, too, is just another form of a symbiotic relationship where both partners seek something which the other partner has.
In the end, a happy relationship is a happy relationship — whether it is an outcome of years of dating, or a chance encounter through Tinder, or via an arrangement on Seeking.com.
Old Wine, New Bottle
Prostitution is considered as among the oldest professions in the world.
Sugaring is essentially a new age prostitution system specifically for the elite, caters to both physical and emotional needs, and has a more specifically defined terms and conditions.
The Silent Monk very silently observes, and tries to come to terms with what the world is up to these days.
Whether people are exchanging love for love, or love for money, or surrendering themselves completely for free unto their partners, it is entirely their choice. A happy relationship, even if built upon Sugaring, is still a happy relationship.
As long as both the members are doing it willingly and are treated with due respect, it is better than many other toxic relationships people tend to stay in.
As far as The Silent Monk is considered, he had learnt it long ago that he is no one to judge people. He has made enough mistakes in life to not be able to do that.
He personally would not want to build a relationship based upon anything other than love and respect — but he is definitely not the smartest person in the world, (may be the stupidest of all).
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