Every single day, before starting a conversation, I would ask the other person “How are you?”, and I did this repeatedly for 6 months with a group of more than 30 people!!!

Trust me, it has been a fun exercise!!!

I did this very mundane tweak in my day-to-day conversation when I was recently transferred to a new office, and worked with a completely new set of people for 6 months.

I never knew that how someone responds to such a simple question can tell us so much about their personality. Based upon how everyone responded, there are five different types of people as mentioned below:

I. The skeptics

“Is there something wrong with me that you ask me this everyday?”

One of the most strange reply I have heard, and these are the people who stunned me the most. When I asked them how they are doing, they began to question themselves if everything is fine with them. And when I continue to ask them this everyday, one of them said to me, “Is there something wrong with me that you are asking me everyday how I am doing?”

I erupted in laughter only to reassure them that everything is just fine, except that we as human beings have forgotten to ask each other about their well being.

I wonder at what point in our quest for corporate revolution, did we forget to take care of people — but only care for never ending projects and their never ending deadlines.

II. The ones who are lost

This is my second favorite group of people.

For a good amount of people, when I asked them how they are doing, they just did not hear what I said and continued discussion with the points on their minds.

Then in the middle of the conversation, they stop and respond “I am ok!”. 😃
I cannot help but smile yet again.

I realize that people have way too many things going on in their minds that they do not have time and space for such trivial matters as their mental and physical health.

III. The ones who return gratitude with gratitude

I am okay, I am okay 😃.

I am gooooood (an extra long good). Thank you (with a very broad smile).

These are my favorite sets of people and glad to share that most of the people fell in this category. They stop whatever they are doing, pass a very broad smile and say “I am gooood”. They reciprocate through one small gesture, and it lightens the environment around them.

With all the changes happening in the world, the silent monk is happy to note that most people still reciprocate kindness with kindness, gratitude with gratitude and smiles with smiles.

Such is life as well, and there is no dearth of good people in the world.

IV. The ones who started asking me “first”

As I continue to ask others “How are you?” — only two people imbibed this habit and started asking me “How are you?” before I could ask them the same 😃. I guess I am only reaping what I am sowing.

2 out of 30 is a very small number, yet I am happy with the same.

With such a small number of people taking initiatives, I wonder that people are often good at reciprocating good things rather than taking initiatives.

Hence, if you have the capability to initiate something for the greater good, be assured that kind people will join you.

V. The ones who replied in “a negative manner”

Only one instance 😃!

In my entire 6 months, there was only one instance out of total 5400 instances (30x6x30) where someone replied in a negative tone:

“I will be much better if you do not make such changes in the work.”

I guess I will take it — it is not that bad, and 1/5400 failure rate sounds like a win anyway.

At the end of 6 months, I realized that how asking such a simple question can tell you so much about people, their behaviors, and life in general.

If there is someone who is very annoyed with you for no reason, try going to him/her, pass a smile and ask, “How are you?”. Trust me things will turn out well for you 😃

Recap to remember:
 — People return gratitude with gratitude. If not all, then most of it.
 — A simple “How are you?” can make someone’s day, and we should not be stingy in saying so.
 — If you are doing something good, have faith that people will join you as well.

Please share your thoughts about the article, and any such instance when a mundane conversation gave you deep reflections about life.
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