For almost three years now, I have not eaten in the same room as my father! The reason lies within this article!

Let me share one of my worst nightmares!

Perfect riverside view on a moonlit night at the finest restaurant in the city — and a date with the most amazing person. We have immediately taken off on the right note, and with every conversation my mind goes “Aww! How amazing is she!” She is looking gorgeous, talks sensibly, seems both compassionate and intelligent, we share similar interests, and on top of it — She is giving me all her attention. What are the odds of that happening! My stupid mind has already started weaving dreams of happily ever after.

But the moment dinner is served, the best laid plans of monk all end in a flash.

All my attention goes to one and only one the tiniest of details — “How loudly does she eat!” All of a sudden, she is no longer gorgeous or compassionate or intelligent or anything that I mentioned earlier — now she is just a person who makes a little too much noise while chewing. However hard I may try, I cannot notice the perfect personality that sits across the table, and all of it is subdued under one single characteristic — the loud chewing sound.

The date ends pretty quickly, and we never called each other again.

Glad that the above scenario is hypothetical but it remains one of my biggest nightmares!

I suffer from what should not be categorized as a disease or even a disorder, but a condition called Misophonia.

Technically speaking, Misophonia is essentially a reduced tolerance to certain types of sound.

For me particularly, it is the chewing sound or any other sound one makes while eating.

How bad can Misophonia be for a person?

For me personally, I just cannot tolerate it!

• If you are eating food in a room full of 10 people and make anything other than an ordinary chewing sound, my head would turn first.
• If we are talking on a phone and you begin to eat, I will notice it immediately.

I was once on an audio call with my manager, and he was constantly slurping noodles throughout our conversation. O Dear! I thought I should have gotten a hardship allowance for surviving this.

And don’t you dare talk in front of me with food in your mouth!

There have been times when I have had arguments within my own family — “How hard can it be to keep your mouth shut while eating😠?”

However trivial it may sound, but there were times when Misophonia brought out the worst in me.

What is the root cause for this disease?

An explanation for such condition (and many more) has been perfectly given by a famous neurologist, Oliver Sacs, in his amazing book, “The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat”.

Oliver explains that in some cases, our brain becomes too active that it notices even the tiniest of details, and gets fazed by it.

The details can be anything — a humming bee sound, background traffic noise, the tik-tok sound of heels, or a normal chewing sound. Our brain is so active that all these noises act like a hammer banging on our head, and we end up showing extreme sensitivity to such noises. In severe cases, it is can also lead to disorder such as Autism.

How I am dealing with this?

I struggled with Misophonia but it all changed at a point, when I realized the problem is with me, and not with anybody else. It all became very clear to me that in a room full of 10 people, I am the only one who has a problem with someone chewing loudly. So it is me who has to adapt.

So now I have a set methodology to deal with this:

1. If I know someone eats loudly, I do not eat in the same room at the same time as the other person. This is also the reason I do not eat alongside my father 😃.
2. I try exposure therapy wherein you expose yourself, in the tiniest of steps, to people who make loud chewing sounds. And you constantly remind yourself that its not their fault. Over a period, you increase your tolerance to the same.

Over the years, I have improved a lot and become much more tolerant to loud chewing noises. Not comfortable but tolerant 😃!

I have realized that it is not a mental disorder or a disease, but it is just a lifestyle change that I have to make, and have happily done that over the past three years.

The humor in all of this is that my mother often teases me — “What if your wife happens to make loud chewing sound?” We all erupt in laughter, but I don’t think I will ever have an answer for that 😄.

This article will make you smile today😃, give it a try:

https://medium.com/illumination/my-lovely-loose-pyjama-and-a-happy-life-story-6ffb97b76ab8

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