There are two types of introverts — the first ones are the born introverts, and the second ones are the forced introverts. We need to identify people who are subjecting themselves to forced introversion and help them.

I am an introvert of the highest order, and I totally love it. I can continue to gaze at the ceiling fan go round and round till eternity, and never get bored. I can sit for hours in solitude in one corner of my apartment, and silence has always been my best companion. I prefer to stay in isolation because I value it more than staying in the company of all the wonderful people out there. But again, I am a natural introvert and all these things come naturally to me.

Having said this, I have often come across situations in my personal life which force me to go into my shell more than I want to be.

Sometimes we are introverts because we want to spend more time with ourselves. Sometimes we become introverts just because we do not want to face the outside world! These two are entirely different things.

Mental health, bullying and inferiority complex are among the main reasons for forced introversion!

I. Inferiority Complex

Have you ever been tired of all your friends, first cousins, colleagues doing exceedingly well in their respective lives, and yet you are the only one who is constantly struggling to even identify what you wish to do in your life?

There is a celebration party being thrown by your friend, and you are invited. But often such success parties do a very good job of reminding yourself how unsuccessful you are, and all that you have not been able to achieve. When you are struggling with your own life, it becomes difficult to be happy for others. It is easier for us to portray that we don’t like to go to parties and be an introvert rather than to attend such events and fake display everything is fine.

II. Mental Health

I wonder how to explain the pain of a mental health patient to a person who has not experienced the same. As a mental health patient, you somehow find reasons to be sad, and you just cannot help it. You might have the ultimate luxury at your disposal, yet there would be only one thing that is bothering you, and that overshadows everything else. We lose the ability to appreciate good things in life, and are happy to embrace negativity. And you never know when the tears would start rolling!

People can continue to give us lectures as to how Life is beautiful, yet they would never understand that they are not helping us. Eventually, we would not even like to get out of our room, and be an introvert.

Being a mental health patient is still a taboo, but being called as an introvert is a good personality trait. We often hide our mental health issues by donning the hat of an introvert.

III. Bullying

There is a person in the workplace who constantly harasses you, opposes all your suggestions, and never let go of any opportunity to make you feel small.

Over a period of time, you would lose your self esteem and would prefer not to utter a word! Remember, you are still equally competent in your job, yet you constrain yourself from expressing fully. Eventually, there is a perception going around that you are an introvert and are a person of limited words. No one would ever know what has transpired behind the forced introversion.

What we need to do?

Forced introversion is more common than we think, and there are people who need our help. Maybe they do not even recognize this, but they surely need our help. As a person who is a natural introvert and has been a forced introvert at times — I personally feel I can differentiate between the two.

In my office and social circle, I identified two people who I felt that are maybe forcing them into forced introversion. The only thing that I do has been to talk to them in a friendly manner and just make them feel comfortable. I have never asked them why they are so quiet, or if something is bothering them — remember we should never do that!

I simply pay an extra attention to their low voices amidst all the loud people, and make sure it is heard by everyone. Over a period of few months, I was happy to note that one of the two is coming out of his shell, and is more confident of his ability. And most importantly, he feels very comfortable to come and talk to me. The other person is still in his shell, and its okay. Each one shall have their own course, and we must respect that.

To all the readers, I would request that if you happen to see someone around you — who you think could be forcing himself/herself to be an introvert, just talk to them and make them feel comfortable. This is nothing short of a service to humanity.

The world needs great introverts, but they have to be the natural introverts and not the forced ones.

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